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Thank you, Mormon Zone, for giving me the bestest toy EVER!

My blog has a wide variety of readers.  One of which is a former intern at my current workplace.  She's LDS, and has a great sense of humor.  She's one of the "normal" mormons (I blog about the wacky ones) and always tries to add some with and mormon-truth to my blog.

Recently she turned me on to a website called Mormon Zone.  It is full of LDS jokes, and she thought I could get a tidbit or two for my blog.  I spent about an hour on the site, and she was right.  I DID get something worthwhile from Mormon Zone!

But not what she expected.  You see, most of the jokes were lame.  Ultra lame.  It had 'top 10' jokes about different LDS scenarios, and talked about their fetish with Jello Salad.  While slightly humorous, I didn't really see it as 'blog-worthy.'

However, one super-cool function I found on their site was their cleanliness rating:

This site has been verified as Ultra-Clean by cleanmeter!  Yay!!  But no wonder the jokes were so boring.  They're as tame as they get.  No pot-stirring, no controversy, no innuendo.  Just clean, happy, mormon jokes...

Cleanmeter is a website that lets you check the cleanliness of web pages before you go browsing.  It is used as a tool for parents to safeguard their children from seeing vulgar and obscene websites.

While I applaud the efforts of cleanmeter, I see this tool more as a toy.  I wondered what cleanmeter would say about my blog?

I typed in my url, and this was the result:

Two bits of vulgarity launched me into the mid-yellow range.  I'm not sure if I was more surprised at the lack of filth on my site, or the fact that only 2 vulgar references got me into the middle of 'naughty boy' range.

So I tried a few more bloggers I follow:

This is The Animated Woman.  She has an amazing blog, and is usually fairly clean.  I would consider her blog more child-safe than my own, yet according to cleanmeter her website was considered more dangerous than mine.  (I wonder how she will react when she sees this?)  One crude anatomical reference is scarier than two vulgarities... interesting...

Jillsmo at Yeah. Good Times. is a little more avant-garde, and it shows on the meter.  It catalogs all of her naughtiness, and shows you why I adore her blog so much.  This mommyblogger has a mouth, and an amazing sense of humor.  But BEWARE!!!  She's a scary RED on the meter!!

And then there's Michelle at Rantings of the Reckmonster.  She pretty much broke the scale, and I love her for that.  You go girl!!  Scare them sheltered children!!

Want to know where your blog ends up?  Or do you want to test your favorite websites?  Go to Cleanmeter's Website and enjoy the fun!
Please Share it! :)

41 witty retorts:

Drake Sigar said...

Sexual references: 6
Crude anatomical references: 11
Potential anatomical references: 6
References to deity: 2

Considering the speed and lack of precision at which it calculated, I’m guessing it only analyzes the surface page. There must be thousands of crude anatomical references alone!

Smart Ass Sara said...

The #1 search word for my blog is cat raping.So I'm going to assume I'm bad. :)

Pickleope said...

Thank you for bestowing this toy to us. It's so much fun. For I got:
Sexual references: 5
Potential sexual references: 3
Crude sexual references: 1
Anatomical references: 1
Crude anatomical references: 2
Potential anatomical references: 1
Vulgarity: 7
Mature themes: 2
Insults: 4
References to alcohol: 3
References to deity: 1
Profanity/swearing: 1
I don't understand what a "potential anatomical reference" is. Did I mention a baseball bat or a the Washington Monument? It's also fun to go and try and pick out what they consider vulgarity. And I had WAYYYY more insults than that.

Heather (aka Sugar Free) said...

Is this bad?

Sexual references: 3
Potential sexual references: 1
Sexual solicitation: 2
Crude sexual references: 1
Crude anatomical references: 7
Potential anatomical references: 1
Sexual profanity: 24
Vulgarity: 28
Sexual orientation terms: 1
Mature themes: 2
Insults: 3
References to alcohol: 2
References to deity: 1
Profanity/swearing: 1

One profanity? Puh-lease!! Clean meter needs to learn how to count.

Thanks for sharing this! Now I have something to keep me busy at work today!


Chunky Mama said...

My blog is pretty tame, but my result was about 1/3 of the way into the red zone.
Is is wrong to be proud of this?

The Animated Woman. said...

Oh great. Now I'm gonna hafta scour my blog just to find my "crude anatomical reference". Oh wait.....wait. Yeah, I know where it is. HAHAHAHA! Hang on a minute - since when is the word "vagina" crude???

Thanks man. I wonder how rates...

Anonymous said...

this has provided endless fun and a twitter battle to see whose site is the dirtiest! haha. Love it!

It is no surprise that my Naughty Nothings site is off the freaking charts with:

Sexual references: 39
Potential sexual references: 10
References to sexual clothing: 11
Crude sexual references: 10
Anatomical references: 9
Crude anatomical references: 14
Potential anatomical references: 37
Sexual profanity: 6
Insults: 1
References to alcohol: 2
References to deity: 1
Profanity/swearing: 1

That is just the one post! hahaha. I freaking love myself! I have 37 "potential" anatomical references? That is amazing! References to sexual clothing...epic!

Totally in love with this site! hahaha.

Salted Plum said...

Lol, this really is the best toy ever.

Shutterbug said...

LOL. I'm not sure the Mormon's would be too pleased with my shirtless posts. ;)

jillsmo said...

Wow! I... I'm speechless.... I don't know what to say.

I'd like to thank my kids.... they're responsible for most of my unending string of curses. Without them, none of this would have been possible. I'd like to thank my best friend alcohol. Love you, baby!

Lady Estrogen said...

Although, I'm kind of sad I didn't get the explosion!

Sexual references: 11
Potential sexual references: 5
Sexual solicitation: 2
Terms referring to pornography: 1
Anatomical references: 1
Crude anatomical references: 5
Sexual profanity: 7
Vulgarity: 15
Sexual orientation terms: 2
Insults: 3
References to deity: 2
Profanity/swearing: 7

ed said...

meter looks pretty spot on

Dwija {House Unseen} said...

As I expected, I am totally in the green (hello! My aged aunts and my pastor read my blog!) but I did get a few dings that made me laugh:

Sexual orientation terms: 1
References to alcohol: 2

Sexual orientation terms? WTF does that even mean? And really? Only TWO references to alchohol? Just 2?

Awesome toy!

Bart said...

lol most the ppl that visit your blog are hot chicks. and i'll tryu to sneak some hooter pics for ya

D4 said...

I wonder what terms I may have used referring to pornography. It's odd, my meter is about one "Holy Allah, Batman!" to be fully unappreciated. I expected my blog to be yellow at the LEAST. I'm pretty happy with it though. Seriously just like a cm and a half away from full blown red. That's impressive.

squatlo said...

You could have saved me the trouble and looked me up for I have to do it myself!

Shit! (that gets you another bad mark, right?)

Zombie said...

I am gonna check out my site with that thing!! :D

Adsila said...

Good for you breaking the meter!!! You have my total respect, hee hee!

Mynx said...

I am so going to have to try this cause I have made macaroni jewelry just a little naughty in my last post. It is all in the way you market it I believe

Rob said...

You have given me a fun site to play with :D

Al Penwasser said...

I just tried Clean Meter. It's really cool, although my blog is just over the red line. Among other things, Penwasser Place has "Crude Sexual References" and "Crude Anatomical References." I think it was when I mentioned 12 inch dildos with remote controls. I could be wrong, but I'll bet that's it. Also, under "References to Deity" I scored a 5. I'm thinking this is to be expected on something which is hosted on a blog called "Mormon Zone."
Aw, screw them and their bicycles.


Uh,...I tried to put my website on it and it told me to SEEK JESUS!

...that's bad, right?

Rob said...

Lol brilliant little tool

THE SNEE said...

Best Toy Ever! I like the colors they choose too. It reminds me of the weather map. Green for rain, yellow for thunderstorm watch, Red for extreme danger. Can't wait to test THE SNEE!Heheheheeee

Thank, Q said...

First of all, I'm only surprised that Reckmonster didn't shut down Clean Meters' servers.

I'm slightly yellow for my blog.

Sexual references: 4
Potential sexual references: 1
Anatomical references: 1
Insults: 3

I think my recent blog on Anthony Weiner put me over the top. LOL!

The Reckmonster said...

In the immortal words of Flava Flav (from the ORIGINAL PUBLIC ENEMY circa 1988) - "Yeahhhhhh Boyeeeeeeeeee!!!!"

Claude said...

Yeah boy, 100% clean for my blog. I suppose it can't check images. Or maybe my blog is somehow totally clean, whut?

Skankin_Pete said...

Holy shit I'm all the fucking way in the fucking green, what the fuck is that horse shit, you have inspired me to do a post tomorrow that will be sure to rectify this bull shit!

Also: Shit Piss Fuck Cunt Cocksucker Motherfucker Tits =P

On My Soapbox said...

Bahaha!! This is frickin' hilarious! I am going to steal it for a blog post some time. Good thing there isn't a "Clean Meter" for my mind or vocabulary. It would be fun to watch the meter explode.

Neon said...

My blog is only in the middle, I guess I need to swear more. :D

Kar said...

My blog where I post my very graphic naughty stories came up as clean. the site my bf helps run is all hard core sex and it only hit halfway into the red. Ineresting.


Mynx said...

ok, I checked my "good" blog nd I got a mid red rating and

Sexual references: 4
References to sexual clothing: 1
Terms referring to pornography: 2
Crude anatomical references: 2
Vulgarity: 7
Insults: 6
References to alcohol: 6
References to deity: 2
Profanity/swearing: 2

Too scared to check the naughty blog lol

Ally said...

where have i been, i'm totally doing this. my blog is super prudent as i try to keep it innocent. i am proud to report:

Vulgarity: 2
References to deity: 1

ps i was in this horrible store today filled with photo frames that said LIVE LAUGH LOVE and thought of your blog post about the mormons and laughed out loud. ha ha.

Kimberly said...

Had to play with this toy. Ran a check on my blog:

and my rating was in the yellow, but just barely...and almost red, but the only things they "found" were:

References to deity: 1
Profanity/swearing: 2


M. Hicks said...

Sexual references: 10
Potential sexual references: 5
Terms referring to pornography: 1
Anatomical references: 6
Crude anatomical references: 5
Sexual profanity: 4
Vulgarity: 35
References to alcohol: 3
References to deity: 8

I almost caught up to Lady Estrogen. I'm proud of me. I think considering anatomical references are a no-no I can't get through this filter even on a clean day.

This is an awesome toy! Everytime I wear my Polygamy Porter t-shirt I think of your blog. There is one good thing in Utah, and it's beer (though still too low in %)

Not Just Another Jennifer said...

That's hilarious! I love jillsmo. I wonder what Aunt Becky's rating would be from It probably would implode...

Jonah Gibson said...

You're right. Cleanmeter is a great toy. Wouldn't you love to know how it works. My blog is a little irreverent, but I try not too be crude because my nieces read it. Also I quote scripture and post entries that could only be described as theological, although they certainly would not get an imprimatur from any self-respecting bishop. Still the Cleanmeter thinks I'm on the line twixt yellow and red. WTF??

Potential sexual references: 10
Sexual solicitation: 3
Crude anatomical references: 1
Vulgarity: 1
Sexual orientation terms: 2
Mature themes: 1
Insults: 3
References to alcohol: 1
References to deity: 3

Mollie said...

Somehow, I'm in the red with this? Fuckers.

References to sexual clothing: 2
Crude anatomical references: 1
Sexual profanity: 2
Vulgarity: 3
Insults: 1
References to deity: 2
Profanity/swearing: 2

Sinclair said...

I'm pretty sure I'd be through the roof. Then again, if it only checks the surface page, I might get a good score, actually...

Pieter MD said...

I used it on loads of websites, sometimes it's not kinda right =/

Sonja said...

This is what it told me..."There was a problem accessing the website. Error description: point1point2point3 Please try again later or enter a different website now."

Apparently my website broked it. Muwahaha!!!

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