In fact, most people appreciate a good backside. Even our President from time to time has to appreciate "Dat Ass" when he sees a good one.
Sorry. It's not to be offensive. We're just showing our appreciation.
Throughout the ages people have appreciated a nice rump. In fact, I'd like to present a list of ten (plus one) songs made in honor of the booty.
You may argue with the ranking, but there's no argue about the theme. It's time to get it right, and get it tight.
#10 - Big Bottoms by Spinal Tap. When they see a fine ass, they turn it to 11. Best Lyric: "My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo / I wanna sink her with my pink torpedo..."
#9 - Ms New Booty by Bubba Sparxxx. Best infomercial ever? Best infomercial ever. And half the song is whispering. Bonus.
#8 - The Thong Song by Sisquo. Dumps like a truck. Thongs were mildly popular in the 90's, but really took off because of this song. Suddenly girls everywhere were wearing thongs, thanks in part to this platinum-haired man. Thank you, Sisquo. Thank you.
#7 - Shake Ya Ass by Mystikal. Mostly because Mystikal is badass, but his lyrics started a revolution of girls getting freakier and freakier in clubs. We can probably thank this man for playing a part in making the zillions of Girls Gone Wild DVD's.
#6 - Dazzey Duks by Duice. One hit wonder, yes. But what a hit. I'd hit it.
#5 - Rump Shaker by Wreckx-n-Effect. The quintessential Rump-shaking song. Perfect beat, perfect tempo. You want a girl to shake their rump? Play this song.
#4 - Face Down, Ass Up by 2 Live Crew. True, not their #1 hit, but 2 Live Crew's song about da butt is fantastic. Cuz that's the way I like to fuck... and cuz they performed Live on the Phil Donahue show in front of an audience of mostly old white people...
#3 - The Shocker by Warner Drive. I almost put this at #1, but I knew it would stir up controversy. If you haven't had the pleasure of listening to this song, you really really need to.
#2 - Baby Got Back by Sir-Mix-A-Lot. No, not the #1, but a close #2. This song put big butts on the map in the 90's, and is still on 86% of iPods worldwide. It's. That. Awesome.
FUN FACT! This song is the first musical purchase I ever made. I purchased the cassette single when I was in Junior High, and lip-synced to this song until the tape finally wore itself out...
#1 - Fat Bottomed Girls by Queen. Why #1? Because butts are so damn powerful, even a gay man like Freddie Mercury still loves them. Besides. Queen was lovin on butts before lovin on butts was cool. That makes them ass-hipsters, and a strong #1. GET ON YOUR BIKES AND RIDE!
Honorable Mention: It Must Be Jelly (Cuz Jam Don't Shake Like That) by Glenn Miller. Back in the 1930's, people were still singin about the booty. Here's an old swing ditty that deserves recognition. Enjoy!
Did I not get it right? Did I miss a song that deserves recognition? Do you like da butt? Feel free to chime in!