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Screw this. Game on. Challenge Accepted.

I'm done.  I'm fed up.

This has been something that has bothered me for years, and now I'm finally going to stop half-assing and do something about it.

I'm losing the weight.

This job rules in a lot of ways, but living on the road means more fast food than I like, and more time on my ass in a car.

I'm not burning calories, and I'm ingesting way more than usual.  I have gained about 12lb since starting this job.

So now I say to you, and to the world:  Fuck naw.  I'm done.  I'm going to find a way to eat healthier, exercise on the road, and get to my ideal weight.

Starting today.  Which is tough, because it's breakfast time and I'm hungry.

Minimal fast food.  Staying in hotel rooms with fridges and microwaves, so I can at least buy food at a grocery store and 'cook' it.  Ordering from the 'healthy' menu when I hit drive-thrus.

And most importantly (and hardest of all...) no more soda or rockstars.  It's water only for me.

Now the trick is to find a way to exercise in hotel rooms.  Some have fitness centers, but not all.  Pushups, crunches and yoga will be easy to do in my room.  Maybe I'll take a morning jog before I start my day.  Maybe I'll invest in water weights that travel easy.

All I know is I'm SICK AND FUCKING TIRED of being larger than I'd like.  The first step is to stop growing.  The next step is shrinkage.

I'm putting this out there for the world to see.  Maybe this will keep me on track.  By late January, when I turn 31, I will reach my goal weight of 200lb.   Because I'm in a Billings hotel, it's hard to say what I'm at now.  Probably between 235 and 250, so I have a decent way to go.

But I'm going to do it, dammit.  Fuck this.  Fuck being fat.

It's on.
Please Share it! :)

30 witty retorts:

Qc said...

Good job ! That's a great way of thinking. Losing the weight will not only make you feel better but also garanties more time in the future with you children because you won,t have any health issues. For you food, if I can make a suggestion : buy your food prior to leaving and keep it in a cooler. My mom has done that for years because she travels all the time in the car (so no moving) and it works great. Baby carrots, cheeze sticks, that sort of stuff. Eggs are also a great option for breakfast, because they are high in protein low in fat. Protein powder may also be a good buy to put in smoothies. You can change up the fruit you put in. Or a whole grain toast with peanut butter. The goal is to get protein with the less fat possible so you don't get hungry. For your jogging, the best way to burn calories and get your cardio up is to do intervalls (start with 1 min walk, 1 min jogg.) I'm not a health professional nor do I recommend these things, I'm only suggesting. My dad is a doctor and both my parents biked across Canada so I know quite a bit about fitness and food ;) But again : I'm only suggesting ! I wish you success in your quest for health :) Oh and the app Lose it ! is really great to help monitor the number of calories per day/week, you goal, etc. It works really well !

Mooner Johnson said...

Brandini. How about I send a photo of the ostrich Rick Perry with the wooden deer statue sticking out his ass.

All you can see are the top of the deer's head and most of his pointy rack, but I couldn't eat for hours after I saw it in person. Maybe if you take a glance at the photo before you eat something you shouldn't it'l put you off the meal.

Also, more sex will help. Any sort of sex takes your mind off eating. Unless, of course, you masturbate to pictures of ice cream sundaes.

Maybe we can invent a new diet and sell it. Call it "Weight Lost In Idaho"[.]

OK, I'm the idea man and you need to flesh this baby out.

Anonymous said...

Come on! You can do it! Put a little power to it!!

(My favorite soft ball cheer! Just for you!)

Just remember lots of protein and stay away from the carbs!!

Pickleope said...

Right on! Good on you for making a change and the best of luck. I find it helps to have people you haven't seen in a long time who don't know how to filter what they say constantly tell you you've gotten big. That's a motivator.


I've done the same thing. I went shopping recently and had to get 2 sizes larger on my pants. I said F that I'm losing weight. I work out on a regular but I eat like crap (fast food)I said F--- it this Saturday. I'm giving up alot of fast food and carbs and while I'm hungry, I know that being healthy is the way to go. Good luck in your adventure. I would also encourage you to check out and find others who want to work out in your area. Good luck

MRanthrope said...

awesome news man. I've cut back on soda's and stuff because yeah, it's bad for you but also, it's expensive! Water is the healthier/cheaper solution for sure.

Crunches, push ups and a resistance work out band are all you really need to start getting results/

Tony Van Helsing said...

Don't cut out your favourite stuff altogether or it will be forbidden and even more tempting. Moderation is key.

AmberLaShell said...

Good luck, I know exactly how difficult losing weight can be.

Random Girl said...

Good on you!! Sounds like you have really made up your mind. I have a great little exercise thing that travels perfect and is a whole body workout. It really is simple but it works. If you can get over Tony Little (i mute the dvd so I can still see the timer thing but don't have to hear him or his cheesy music and rock Pandora while I sweat) it really is a great option and fairly cheap. I think i ordered it off HSN but I really use it, like almost every day since January. It's the EasyShaper. Here's a link. I'm not getting paid for this endorsement, I just get excited when I find something that works and is easy.

Annabelle said...

I hear ya!

You know what? Let's do it togther.

I'm serious. I can barely fit in my pants these days, it's humiliating.

I have lost and regained about 50lbs in the last 3 years. After having 2 kids in 2-1/2 yrs) and getting my first sit on my ass office job I was way too big.
I started a great healthy eating program + excersise and lost around 50lbs. Then my mom died. That was just over 2 years ago and I have gained all that back.

I can't fit into my clothes, I can't walk up the train station stairs without wanting to punch someone, I don't look at my reflection, if I can help it.

But, I think you're right, it only changes when YOU are ready to do the work.

You need to find healthy snacks for road trips, easy non cook recipies for hotel stays, and water flavors with caffeine.

You can do it - and you can do, I can do it!!

Steve Bailey said...

Good luck...... fast food is the devil....once you get the ball rolling it gets easier!

D4 said...

Go you! The first and more important step right out of the way. You can do it, don't let us down!

Choirchick22 said...

I wish You lots of luck!! :)

Not the Hero said...

You want a work out that is effective and doesn't require equipment look up "the Naked Warrior" it is all about the exercises you can do just with your body weight.

Good luck.

Golden Girl said...

ill be thinkin of you since i myself and trying to muster up the will power to lose weight. when you figure out how to do it and keep it off, send the info my way!!!

The Reckmonster said...

Go, B! Go, B! Word. You will be my idol if you can make that weight fly off while having a travel job...because it will prove to me that I have NO excuse for allowing my own "back nine" to keep spreading out all over my sit-on-my-fat-ass office chair.

Anonymous said...

You can do it! Kick that weights chubby ass. You got this. :)

Zombie said...

Good luck man! I just recently got myself a membership to a gym so I will be slimming down too! lol.

Vapid Vixen said...

That's awesome. I've been procrastinating my "skinny jean diet" but I think I'm gonna have to just suck it up and start. This post helps. Good luck and keep us updating on your inevitable success.

paigefurr said...

Hey pal, I feel your pain... It's a gradual process... working out is a must. every day. in the morning is the best. plus i've found the best way to loose weight is to cut cholesterol. eat only lean meat, lots of veggies and salads,
and cut the saturated fats! this is most important! no butter, no cheese, only skim milk or soy milk, and read the nutrition labels! it does work! it takes time... but it's totally worth it! good luck, pal! i love your blog and read it daily!

Anonymous said...

Go for it! It's not easy when you're on the road, but it can be done. Just stay focused and don't make excuses.

Easier said than done.

I lost 25 lb's last year, but I've gained at least 10 of 'em back. I let the extreme weather (3 weeks of 90*+ temps, followed by 2 weeks of rain, followed by 2 weeks of 100*+ temps) disrupt my exercise. And I can't write my novel without gallons of Mountain Dew and Monster, so...yeah. Not getting very far.

Hopefully you'll be better at this than I am. Good luck to you!

Left Coast Guy said...

Hang in there and give 'em hell!


LoneIslander said...

You'll do good bro, don't sweat it.

my day in a sentence said...

You got this, dude.
You'll do this in no time. :)

Mynx said...

Have you thought about investing in a small car fridge? You can stock it with healthy snacks for when you are driving, even homemade frozen meals to microwave when you get to a hotel room.
It will save you money on junk and cafe food and make it easier when you are tired if you already have everything you need for a meal

Inverse said...

You can do this man! No quitting! COME ONE!
I feel like a coach :D

Smart Ass Sara said...

You rock it out baby! If I can lose weight, and I'm the world's laziest person and I have to fight it every second of the day, then you can too. :)

Thank, Q said...

Good luck with that, man! I need to do the same. Maybe if I post that I'm going to try, I'll be motivated to actually do it!

Cpeezy said...

Good luck with your journey! Maybe when you are on the go, look up workouts on Youtube to watch. There are great workouts you can do just in a room or space. Kickboxing videos are awesome.

Pish Posh said...

Do me a favor and comment on Cpeezy's blog will you? It's a Puddle of Vexation. She's following my rules and commenting on everyone else's posts to be supportive

Also - the traveling thing makes it hard. Just remember to drink lots of water to fill up those cravings from soda (I cut out soda a few months ago) and instead of fat think fruit. Fuck fat choose fruit.

Also, my fat ass finds that simply doing 100 jumping jacks in my room is a pretty good little quick exercise as well. If you really want to piss yourself off, since you're a guy, lunges and burpies are kick-ass things you can do in your room too.

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