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Pre-Movie Review: My Thoughts on the Moments Before The Hunger Games

I'm an avid book reader, and The Hunger Games was a very fun read.  When I heard it was coming out as a movie, I knew I would see it within the first week.

And I rarely do that.  The last movie series I HAD TO SEE RIGHT AWAY was the Lord of the Rings trilogy (and NO, I didn't dress up).

So, the Monday after the release, my girlfriend and I went to see The Hunger Games in theaters.

The movie was good, although there were some minor changes from the book (there always is in every adaptation, get over it purists...).  What made this moviegoing experience memorable was the 30 minutes leading up to the start of the movie.  This is not a movie review, this is a pre-movie review.

We arrived a half hour early, to ensure good seating.  Showings were every 30 minutes, and most people were trying to cram into the 6:30 screening while we opted for 7:00.

We get to the screening room, and head to the 2nd row from the back.  This row has about 10 feet separating it from the back row, which means nobody kicking our seats.

(I went to see The Phantom Menace in 3D earlier this year, and almost beat the living shit out of a 10yo who wouldn't stop kicking my seat...)

We sat in the center.  5 minutes later, a group of teenage girls came and sat in the same row:

Exits on the left and right.  The came from the left, crossed my gf and I, and sat to the right of us.

They would get up to go get snacks.  Get up to pee before the movie.  Get up to find their other friends.  Every time, instead of going to the closer exit (on the right) they would go in front of us on their way to the left exit.

Seven times, they did this, before the movie even started...

My loving girlfriend remarked "Remember to bring a squirt bottle next time.  If it's good for training cats, maybe it's good for training teens..."

I love her...

(And some warning.  If you frequent the Edwards Movie Theater in Idaho Falls and get squirted with water in the future, it's us.)

As the previews started, my snarkiness grew.

The trailer for the 2nd Snow White movie this season came out, with Bella Swan as the heroine.  I'm no Twilight fan, so I'll be rooting for the Evil Queen this movie...

Johnny Depp (in another Tim Burton movie) playing a Vampire in the 70's, staying with an odd hippie family.  Oh, the hijinks will ensue!!  And what, no Helena Bonham Carter?  Did she die or something?  She's in all the Burton/Depp movies lately!!

Next was Prometheus, which looks like an "oops, we woke up some Aliens that are gonna kill us" type of movie.  Oh, it's made by Ridley Scott?  That makes sense...

What I loved most about the Prometheus trailer were the aliens.  They look like mutated Heffalumps from Winnie the Pooh...

I turn to my girlfriend and say "Holy shit, Pooh was right.  The heffalumps ARE going to get us!"  She laughed.  The people in front of me roared.  I made friends.  It was awesome.

A couple of shitty previews later, the movie started.  Teen girls played with their phones, and got yelled at by a crapton of movie goers.  It made me smile.  The movie was engaging, and would be entertaining for people who haven't read the book.  They explain a lot to make sure nobody gets lost.

But... of course the TwiHards are already getting on board.  I saw some girls this week with "Team Peeta" and "Team Gale" shirts on (when you see the movie or read the books, it will make more sense) when it dawned on me.  This movie is part Twilight, part Running Man, and a little bit of 1984 mixed in.  Nothing is really original in this story, but the mashup of themes works well.

Oh well.  Pass the popcorn (and the squirt bottle).
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13 witty retorts:

Pickleope said...

"I thought the hardcore anal sex scene was a departure from the books."
That's when someone pointed out I erroneously bought a bootleg "Hump-her Games."
(Thank you, thank you, tip your waitress.)

Jillian said...

Our pre-movie entertainment was getting a drunk girl kicked out of the theater! It was funny until she was escorted out of the room and I wondered if she would come back alive...

Anonymous said...

And you didn't stick your leg out and trip at least one of the teens?

Leeanna said...

I know for sure that Helena is in the new Dark Shadows movie and the Prometheus movie by Scott is the pre-Alien series movie. I really need to buy both cause I love Tim Burton and Ridley Scott movies. I have the Hunger Games on reserve to buy from Amazon too.

If you are wondering why the hell don't I just go see the movies at a theater, is because my back pain. I have a problem with sitting more than 15 to 20 minutes at a time. So theaters are quite uncomfortable for me. In a way I really miss that fun theater experience. *sigh

Brandon Lostinidaho said...

Ooooh, you're right! She's in there, playing a Doctor. Found her in IMDB.

The Beans said...

I should start taking my own squirt bottle to my local movie theater. It is FILLED with middle school students/Twilight fans. --.--

-Barb the French Bean

Thank, Q said...

I hate theaters because of most kids and some adults not having any kind of "movie training." I'm not surprised "Dark Shadows" is coming to the big screen. It was a huge show for some, but I couldn't stand it. I'll be avoiding it with all of my might, for sure. I do have to brave the theater for my annual trek to see "Wrath of the Titans." I'm geeked for that. I'll catch that on vacation. Speaking of vacation, Brandon, how about another guest post?

Smart Ass Sara said...

Oh shit- I would have said something. Or purposely tripped at least one girl. I hate people who can't get their shit together BEFORE getting to their seat. If I am crossing- that means I've have a legit issue happening up in there and not just stupidity over not knowing to go before you getting into a crowded theater. Assholes.

meandmythinkingcap said...

Teens or screaming babies. Onetime one old grandpa too offense at my cough and scorned at me "you are rude, you arent supposed to do that to people" and moved to other end of seat near , not phony but phone-glued-to-skin-teens. I hope he learnt the lesson.
They should have one more rating for movies PG-13 to PG-20 for all those teens.
I was impressed with your review and you had to throw in "part twilight". Let me reserve it in "silent revenge" movies list and wait for next fight with my husband.

Leon Kennedy said...

I was excited for the prometheus trailer. I'm not even really an Aliens fan, but that cast is fantastic.

the Tsaritsa said...

Part Battle Royale, part Lord of the Flies, part 1984, part Brave New World, part... Harry Potter? Part Jersey Shore?

I skip the theater because of the noisy people who have no consideration for others (do you need to go on your phone the moment the movie starts-- why??), plus the theaters in SF are where winos go to take naps. And it's hella expensive. Rather wait for Netflix :)

Youngman Brown said...

I just finished the book tonight and will check the movie out sometime this week, most likely tomorrow.

I agree that the book is nothing original, but entertaining nonetheless.

Marta said...

I have bookmarked your website so that I can come back & read more in the future as well. Please do keep up the quality writing.viewster

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