Cats In Heat are Just Plain Wrong

I have two cats:  Weeble and Dora.  Both female, both fixed.

However, Weebs got fixed after her first round of being in heat.  We waited too long, and IT started before her spaying appointment.

OH. MY. GOD.

Photographing Kitty Porn???  PERVERT!!

As if the yowling wasn't enough, she went after the only male in the house (ahem) and begged to be fucked.  It was disturbing.  Ass in the air, or backing into me and dry-humping whatever she could get.

We couldn't throw her outside, because a half-dozen alley cats were outside.  They KNEW there was a female in heat, and they wanted a piece of her...  6-month old innocent virgin... that has to be the holy grail for male cats...

After days of anguish, I finally called the vet.  "I know we can't get her fixed til she's done, doc..." I asked,  "but what can we do in the meantime?"

So the vet tells me a trick:  If I take a cotton swab and rub her in just the right way, it'll get her off and give me a day or so of peace.

...what...

I went to the medicine cabinet....

I grabbed a Q-Tip, and looked at it.  Confused and mortified.

I swallowed my pride, took the swab, and sat down on the couch.  Within seconds she's on my lap, yowling and humping the air as usual.  "Fuck me, daddy!  Fuck me good and put me out of my misery!"

So fuck her I did.  I did just as the vet said:  I pinned her down like a male cat would.  She yowled and hissed and struggled, but it was all a part of the act.  Her rear raised slowly, as if saying:

HELP!  I'M BEING RAPED!  HELP!  (stick it in, daddy)


I took the tip of the swab (heh, just the tip...) and rubbed it where the vet told me to.  She let out moans of ecstasy I have never heard before (shut up) and after about 30 seconds, pretty much passed out on me.

She was spent.

And I felt unclean.  So unclean...  I showered and scrubbed, but I felt so dirty.  So used...

I went through three Q-Tips during that ordeal.  I still have horrible flashbacks whenever I hear a cat yowling for sex...

Years later when I adopted Dora, she got fixed as soon as fucking possible.  There was NO WAY I would go through that disturbing 'kitty porn' scenario again...

And that, my friends, is the story of when I fucked my cat.  She begged me to do it, honest!

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