This post is a satire, so deal with it.
As a child, I had a pack of scented markers. I remember the fun scents: Grape, Cherry, Green Apple, Orange, and...
**SNIIIIIFFFFFFF** Aaaaaahhhh...
...
Wait, what was I saying?
As I grew older, I was confused by the existence of scented markers. You see government ads steering kids from inhalants like canned air, spray paint, and markers.
From one such government site:
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| click to enlarge |
So, big business makes these markers for you to sniff, killing brain-cells. The government tells you not to sniff such things, but if they sanction the business it would create a political outrage.
What's a kid to do? Side with the corporations or the government overlord?
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| Must... watch... Storage Wars.... YUUUUUP... |
It is my belief that these markers are keeping society stupid. Kill the brain cells, and don't worry about people thinking for themselves.
These markers create an army of mindless drones, with grape-scented purple mustaches. The markers are why so many vote along political lines without thought or logic.
These markers may very well be why Mitt Romney is a presidential front-runner...
One advantage to a marker-high is it mellows you out. I had a former boss that would sniff sharpies from time to time, and when you saw that tell-tale dot under his nose, it was going to be a good day...
So.... denizens of the internet. Are you pro-or-anti markers??
