Some People Shouldn't Have Guns (There, I Said It)

Newtown.

Aurora.

Virginia Tech.

Columbine.

All tragedies, all involving guns.

All resulting in overreaction, politics, and idiots on both sides up in arms.

"Ban all the guns."

"Arm everyone."

"Think of the children..."

"...hell, give them guns too..."

No matter what side you're on, you are probably sick and tired of the overreaction of people on news stations and in social media.  The definition of an 'assault rifle' varies from person to person, as well as the opinion of whether we need them or not.

My take on it?  I'm a firm believer of the 2nd amendment.  I know about gun safety, I know how to clean and maintain a firearm, and I educated myself thoroughly before ever touching a gun.  I was not allowed to drive until I learned how to 'do it right' and passed multiple tests, and I treated a firearm with the same respect I did a car.

I had to earn a Driver's License before I could lawfully operate a vehicle.

Could I own a car without a license?  You bet.  But I couldn't drive it until I proved that I knew how.

I think this should be the case with firearms as well.  Sure, there are statistics that prove automobiles are more deadly than guns, but more people die in 'accidents' with cars than in 'accidents' with guns.  Most gun-related deaths are intentional, and are often due to people who shouldn't have them in the first place (criminals, idiots, etc.).

I believe it is my right as an American Citizen to own a gun if I choose to.  However, it is my responsibility to know how to use it properly.  It is my responsibility to not use the gun unless absolutely necessary.  I believe that gun owners should be able to prove they know how to be responsible, just like drivers need to pass tests in order to operate a vehicle.

Gun safety courses should be as mandatory as driver's education, whether you consider one to be a 'right' and the other a 'privilege' or not.  Not only for your own safety, but for the safety of others around you.

A popular sign in Idaho, unfortunately....

If you believe the 2nd amendment means 'trespassers will be shot on sight' you should not own a gun.  If you believe in 'shoot first, ask questions later' you are not responsible enough to own a gun.

(Hell, a lot of these rules also apply to parenting.  If you don't know how to take care of a child or can't afford one, you shouldn't be having children, but that's another argument for another time...)

Comic book quote here, but "with great power comes great responsibility."  There are a lot of smart, responsible gun owners out there, and I don't want to infringe on them at all.  But it's the criminals... the idiots... and the irresponsible that I fear.  A few drops of oil can ruin a gallon of water, and while 99% (ish, maybe) of guns aren't used in crimes, we make laws to protect 100% of the nation.

The idiots on the right are making gun owners look rash and uncontrollable.  The idiots on the left are making gun laws look oppressing and absolute.  No matter what side of the debate you're on, can we talk about this in a civil way?

Don't be an idiot.  Just like you should think before you shoot, thinking before you react (or overreact) is just as important.

Why Did The Black Man Cross The Road? (When Is Racism Funny?)

I spent the majority of last week in Las Vegas and California.  Normally what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but this story just has to be shared.

It's racist, borderline offensive.  But a little funny.  Just bare with me...

I was in Vegas, taking the shuttle bus to the airport from the car rental dropoff.  I was in between a group of drunk tourists and a middle-aged black couple.

The drunk dudes were talking about their trip, and how one of them almost nailed a black chick.

This turned into a few racist jokes.

The black couple was slowly getting more and more offended, and the wife restrained her husband more than once.  I'm getting uncomfortable watching this, but wasn't in a position to make the guys stop.

This continues to escalate until one of the drunkies cracks this joke:  "Hey, why did the black man cross the road?  BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE THE CHICKEN WAS!!"

The black dude laughed a little, and then looked around to see if anyone noticed.

His eyes caught mine.  I pointed to him, with an "I saw that, you laughed" face.  His expression?

He knew he got caught, and then wasn't angry at the drunk dudes anymore.  Apparently racism is ok as long as it's funny...

On that note, that could be why Randy Newman recently made this song:

"I'm Dreaming of a White President" can be seen as racist, but Mr. Newman made this song as a jab to the Republican Party and some of the hate rhetoric going around.

Again, slightly racist, but intended to be funny.

So when is it ok to make a racist joke?  Can black people be self-deprecating and joke about KFC and Watermelon?

Or is that crossing a line, since white people would be crucified for telling the same joke?

Carlos Mencia talks about 'Beaners and Wetbacks' but I can't.

...yet everyone jokes about White Trash and rednecks.  And I'm ok with that.

Can racism be funny?  Can we poke fun at ourselves and each other without getting overly offended?

Or if I shout out "Fuck yo couch, nigga!" will you cry foul?

Have You Ever Wondered What Rudolph Tastes Like? Reindeer Pate For Sale

Everybody celebrates Christmas in a different way.

That is, if you celebrate Christmas at all...

The folks at edible.com are selling Reindeer Pate for those interested in getting a taste of Comet, Cupid, or those unfortunate reindeer that didn't make Santa's cut.

Well, at least, they were.  The delicacy was so popular, they sold out quicker than expected.  At £15 for 190 grams (a little over 6oz), this spendy snack intrigued a lot of people.

And, of course, any popular-yet-odd food is going to attract a handful of protesters as well.  VIVA, the Vegetarians International Voice for Animals, are 'politely' protesting the sellers of this product, claiming inhumane treatment of the reindeer, as well as stressful conditions for the poor animals.

I have to admit, there's nothing more stressful than being killed...

Just aim for the red light, kids...

The pate is a mix of reindeer meat, cognac and spices.  I'm not much of a pate fan, but I'd buy it if it were still available, for two main reasons:

1 - I'm intrigued.  People are buying this left and right, and it may in fact be tasty.

2 - The shock factor.  I'd love to have this on the Christmas table as a fun conversation piece.  I can see my mom in law going "This is DELICIOUS... what is it??"  I smirk, say "Blitzen," and watch her eyes slowly widen...

Besides, I've been on Santa's Naughty list since 1987.  If I'm going to be one of the bad boys, I better live up to my persona, right??

What do you think of this product?  Is this a bad exploitation of the holidays, or just a sign of the times?  Nothing is sacred in the 21st century, and munching on Rudolph's kin is no exception.