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11/30/12

Pet Nutrition and Veterinarians - Why Science Diet Isn't As Good As You Think

Veterinarians are an essential part of any pet's life, as well as a pet owner's life.

They are there to keep your pet healthy, and there to treat your pet in times of sickness and distress.

They go to school for 8 years to earn the 'Dr' in front of their name, so of course they know what they're talking about, right?

...right?

When it comes to nutrition, I disagree.

During their 4 years of veterinary school, they have one 1-unit course on Small Animal (Dog & Cat, primarily) nutrition.

Those college students/graduates/dropouts know how 'intensive' those 1-unit classes are, right?

*snort*

I speak to countless veterinarians thanks to my day job, and know dozens of others around the country who tell me the same thing:  The nutrition course is essentially a Science Diet brainwashing session.  Which is my most veterinarian practices and animal clinics have a wall (or walls) that look like this:


Now, I'm not here to pick on the prescription diets per se.  They're overused, overpriced and sometimes not necessary, but that's beside the point.  I'm here to pick on the normal 'maintenance' diets you find in vet offices, PetSmart and pet stores around the nation.

In my opinion, shitty foods like this actually cause a lot of the problems these veterinarians eventually try to fix.

For example, gluten in foods have been linked to causing Leaky Gut Syndrome, Diabetes, Celiac (gluten intolerances) and obesity (which leads to heart disease, cancer, etc etc etc).  Glutens are basically sugars and starches found in grains like corn and wheat (this is why your neighbor with celiac can't eat bread...).

So basically, gluten causes a lot of bad shit to go down.  How does this relate to Science Diet?  Let's look at the first few ingredients in their Adult Advanced Fitness formula:

- Chicken (OK, chicken's good, but this is a raw list.  Once you cook this stuff all the moisture goes away and it actually drops a few pegs on the ingredient chart.  But meh... another discussion...)

- Whole Grain Corn (Lots of sugar, lots of gluten, which could lead to lots of problems down the road. It's essentially like feeding your dog tortilla chips as a meal)

- Whole Grain Sorghum (Good carb source, gluten free.  No beefs here)

- Whole Grain Wheat (Bread.  More glutens.  Yay, lets feed fido a loaf of bread to go with their nachos.)

- Chicken by-product meal (More meat, which is better for the dog, but by-products?  These aren't hot dogs we're making...)

So...  meat, grain, grain, grain, meat(ish).  2 of the 3 grains used are gluten heavy...  Rice would have been a better option, since you get the carbs and the binding needed to make the food, but not all this gluten...  (which is why SOOOO MANY pet foods are using rice, especially brown rice, in their diets these days...)

But even then... that's a ton of grain.  Do you ever see a dog doing this?

(Poor photoshopping, I know, but I couldn't stop laughing...)

Nope.  Why is that?  What does a dog want?  Oh yeah, MEAT.

There are a lot of good veterinarians that study nutrition on their own and advocate better foods like raw meat diets or grain/gluten-free diets.  Or at least stray away from garbage like Science Diet.  I have respect for those vets.

But alas, every vet in my town sells swill.  Some are adamant that it's the best out there (remember the brainwashing reference??) and will go LA LA LA if you try to educate them otherwise.

In fact, one had a 'diabetes awareness' poster in their lobby.  The argument between the vet and I got so heated I finally grabbed a bag of their food, went to the poster and said "My problem is THIS (points to the food) can very-well cause THAT (points to the sign) because of all the sugars and junk in it.  You want to fix the problem, yet you could easily be the cause of the problem..."

...I'm not allowed in that store anymore.  (totally worth it, though)

 I am not a veterinarian.  I will never neuter your dog, or help treat your cat's cancer.  HOWEVER, I have been in the pet industry for over 10 years now and have studied nutrition heavily for 8 of those 10 years.

Do I have a 'Dr' title in front of my name?  No.

Am I a DVM?  More of a BSA...

source
But I know pet nutrition.  I know how diet can positively-or-negatively affect a pet's physical condition, and I know a lot of the pet foods out there are the root-cause for some major problems and diseases out there.  Glutens should be a 4-letter-word in the pet industry, but they're not.

Please wake up, veterinarian community.  Talk to nutritionists, both with different pet food companies and independent nutritionists.  Don't believe the brands that are owned by candy bar companies (Purina, Pedigree/Nutro), and don't believe the brands that are owned by toothpaste-and-soap manufacturers (Hills/Science Diet, and Iams/Eukanuba).  Don't listen to the money, don't recommend garbage, and do the pets you serve some justice.

And PLEASE WAKE UP, pet owners.  Veterinarians are smart people, but they don't know everything. Vets are like physicians.  They know the basics.  But if you have a spine issue, you go to a specialist.  If you have a tooth issue, you go to a dentist.  If you have nutritional issues, you go to a nutritionist.

Veterinarians (most of them, anyway) are not nutritionists, which is why the "Veterinarian Recommended" tag on every bag of Science Diet is nothing but a joke to me.

11/28/12

Christmas Music and Tard the Grumpycat

It's November 28th... not even December, and 5 radio stations in town are already blaring non-stop Christmas music.

(I can only listen to Elvis sing 'Blue Christmas' so many times, and I've already reached my quota.)

Stores are decked out, and have been for months.

I'm just now getting ready to be festive, but I've had 'the holiday season' shoved down my throat for so long already, I'm already getting grinchy.

Oh wait, the Grinch is so 20th century... so outdated.

Now, it's all about expressing yourself with internet memes.

My favorite for 'the most wonderful time of the year' is Tard, also known as 'grumpycat.'


Tard naturally looks like he's pissed off, and has recently become an internet sensation.  I took this template I found online and made a few Christmas-related rants.  Enjoy!


EVER.  The end.









Feel free to share this post, pin the photos, save/share on Facebook, etc.  I'm all about spreading some holiday cheer!  (and I use that term loosely...)

27 days left, dudes...

11/27/12

If I Throw Tantrums Like Chris Brown, Can I Get Away With Everything Too? #TeamBreezy

Oh, to be 23 again, and to be able to get away with murder...

Well, attempted murder, technically (and allegedly) but now we're just splitting hairs aren't we?

Unless you've been in a social media black hole, you have heard about Chris Brown's latest whiny-ass temper tantrum with Jenny Johnson, causing him to pull the bitch-card and delete his twitter ...again...

If you criticize him, he will call you a 'HOE' and threaten to shit/fart/shart in your eye.

...you know, since he assumes that you want to suck his dick, even though you think he's a punk...

This isn't his first 'I'm not getting my way so FUCK YOU and I'M LEAVING' moment...


Good Morning America asks him some questions he doesn't like, and like a little bitch, he throws a fit.  He smashes a window and walks off the set.

I did that when I was six.  If you don't want to play by my rules, I'm taking my ball and going home.

When I was six, I admit, I was a selfish little punk.  Chris is 23 now, and still acting like a punk who needs a good slap from his mama.

Oh, but that's not all...

He starts talking shit in a club, and Canadian hip hop star Drake doesn't put up with shit.

...I'm still confused by this... there are black people in Canada??  (I kid, I kid)

But Chris' posse and Drake's posse end up in a scuffle, and Chris gets a cut from a bottle thrown at him (or in his direction).

What does he do?  Whines like a bitch, shows his twitter following how 'thug' he is by sporting his battle wound, and gets his 'team breezy' army to make death threats on Drake.

Just like they did to GMA...

And now Jenny Johnson...

Oh yeah, and then there's this.

Remember how many people asked "well did she deserve it?" or "what did she say that pissed him off?" when this happened?

Like any woman should be beaten like this?  EVER?

Oh, but we don't talk about that anymore.  She's forgiven him (classic domestic violence story where the woman stays loyal, *cough*) so it should be ok, right?

What I want to know is this:  What the fuck is wrong with Chris Brown?  Was he not raised right?  If not, not only does he need to be slapped but so do his parents.  At what point do you stop acting like a spoiled little punk and be a man?

A man respects others.  A man respects the person he is with.  He respects his peers.  He doesn't whine and cry when he doesn't get his way.

He respects, and then commands respect in return.

He does not tell people to suck his dick when criticized, or threatens to poo in a person's eye.  (I mean, if we could do that, imagine how much more fun a job performance review would be!)

And yet, he is still popular with teens, tweens and young adults.  Especially women.  He's still on the radio, and making millions.  WHAT.  THE FUCK.  I would love to see a radio-wide ban on him, and anyone else who falls under the 'rape / murder / domestic assault' category.  Can you say 'enabler?'

Elisabeth Hasselbeck called what Chris did to Jenny 'verbal rape.'  For one, I agree with her. (she's a loony one, but she's spot-on here)

Jenny, be glad he only verbally raped you.  If he was closer, he would have probably done to you what he did to Rihanna, and beat you within an inch of your life.

...and get away with it...

Because he whines and cries like a little punk when he doesn't get his way, and for some reason, society forgives him.

And Chris?  If we ever do meet, I have no problem saying this to your face.  If you don't want to hide behind your posse and don't like what I'm saying, come find me.

But I'm warning you... I fight back.

11/23/12

Shame On You - #DogShaming, #PetShaming and a New Way to Shame

Have you heard of Dog Shaming?

It's a fun new meme where you get to make fun of your dog by making it pose with an embarrassing sign.

Do an image search for 'dog shaming' on any search engine and you will find hilarious results, as well as a few websites dedicated to shaming.

If my dog wasn't such a spaz, I would take a few shaming pictures myself.  She eats used maxi pads, likes to steal my work samples (pet treats, toys, etc) and is just an all-around brat.


But unlike these other pets, she just won't stay still for a picture...


Of course, cat owners had to get in on this action too, so now you have 'Cat Shaming.'


The cats really don't seem to give a shit.  They're cats, after all...

But it made me wonder, why don't you see any other 'shaming' pictures out there?  Parakeet shaming? Llama shaming?

I decided to start a new genre for this game:


Boy shaming.  Ladies, when your man does something dumb, punish him by making a 'shame' picture and putting it on the internet.

But what's good for the goose...


...works well with girl shaming as well...


I think it would be a fun way to help people break bad habits.  What do you think?  Have a husband who won't take out the trash?  Have a girlfriend who clips her toenails in bed?

Shame them!  And share the fun!

11/20/12

The LoveBook - A Unique Gift Idea Just In Time for the Holidays

I am a romantic at heart.  Some refer to me as an absolute cheeseball.  I always love finding new, unique and unexpected ways to say 'I love you' to the ones I care about.

This is why I love the LoveBook.

A lovebook is a book you design with your own personal message, for whatever reason you like.

Happy Anniversary?  They have it covered.

Will you marry me?  They can help.

You're the best mom/dad ever?  You bet.

While the themes and templates are there to help motivate you, this book is 100% you.  You choose the words, you build the pages, and your message is what makes this book special.

Best of all, even a dummy like me can navigate the site and build the book at my own pace.  Once you create a profile, they will save your work as you build the book.  If you need 2-3 days (or more) to craft your masterpiece, you have it.

There are over 100 cover designs to choose from, and thousands of premade pages to help motivate you.  If you have an idea in your mind but can't find an illustration to match, they have a design team available to help give your idea life.

Not only do you choose the words on each page, but you can design custom illustrations for your book.  The LoveBook is definitely one of the most versatile gifts you can make.

I made one of these for my girlfriend last Valentine's Day.  She adored it, was absolutely speechless, and keeps it on her nightstand.  When I travel for 3 or 4 days at a time, she reads the book to keep her from getting lonely.

I'm also thinking of making one of these books for my two sons, as a 'daddy loves you' gift.  My oldest will be 7 in a few months, so I will probably make it around his reading level...  "Whether I am in Idaho, Montana, Utah or in your arms, I will always be with you in your heart." (or something to that extent)

In fact, this may be my new 'staple' gift instead of flowers.  Mother's Day, Christmas, Birthdays, Valentine's Day, etc.  The LoveBook, on average, costs less than a bouquet of flowers and will last forever.  Plus EVERYBODY gets flowers... why not be original?

My grandparents would show this off to all of their friends.  This says 'my grandkids are better than yours' better than any bumper sticker ever could.

Or my boys can take this to 'show and tell' at school, and show their classmates they have the best dad ever.

I try not to do full product reviews like this very often, unless it's a product that I actually love.  I love the LoveBook and I know you (and your loved ones) will too.  This gift does not disappoint, and will melt hearts like no other.  Please check them out, play around, and see if giving a LoveBook as a gift makes sense to you.

If you DO want to order your lovebook, make sure to use the coupon code "LOST15" to save an extra 15%.  This is because I love you too, and want to make you happy as well.  (sheesh, the things I do for my readers...)



Note:  This is a sponsored post and I was compensated for this review.  My opinions are my own, and if I hated it I would have been honest with you.  Thank you for your time, NOW GO CHECK IT OUT!!

11/19/12

Winter is Coming

It's a chilly 40 degrees in Eastern Idaho.  It has been raining on-and-off this weekend.

Two weeks ago, snow was falling.  Up to 4 feet in some places.

It's gone now, melted away, but one thing is clear:  Winter is coming.

This means good business for me, since I sell a lot of feed products and the grass is going away.

But it also means shoveling sidewalks, sliding cars and lots and lots of slippery situations.

Ice ice, baby...

This is the awkward time of year where it rains and snows and rains and snows.  When water freezes and melts and freezes and melts, it creates layers of ice on the street and the sidewalk.

It's tough enough just trudging through snow... Imagine snow on an ice skating rink.  One false move and *voop* you're on the floor.

This will be my third true Winter.  I'm acclimated enough, but I still don't like it.

Making things more interesting are potential career moves.  I'm casually entertaining three different job possibilities.  One will have me moving back into sunny Southern California, but the other two are still in the northern area of the US.

Actually, two of the three choices are even farther north than I currently am....

Idaho is bad enough in Wintertime.  If I'm even closer to the Canadian border, will I have to invest in a team of sled dogs?

I mean, it could be fun... commuting to work behind a dozen malamutes (and a giddy German Shepherd) but I think the parking spot may need to be a bit bigger...

I like having four seasons, but there are a lot of things I don't like about Winter, especially the 6 months of Winter Idaho has.  If I move farther north, it's just going to get colder.

What am I thinking?

At least there won't be as many Mormons...

11/16/12

Bar Room Observations: Girls and Drunken Sex Talk

I was at a hotel bar in Billings Montana and was treated to a fun conversation about sex from two drunken women.

Apparently there was an Ag symposium in town as well, and the chaperons came to party after all the 4H kids went to bed.

Two semi-hot women in tight cowboy jeans came up to the bar and started ordering drinks.  After about drink two, they start talking about blowjobs.

And they're arguing.

One insists "It's not a bj unless he pops in your mouth.  If it end in the hand, it's a handjob with some sloppy kisses..."

This argument went on for some time, while I did my best to hide an awkward boner.

Once they came to an agreement about what properly constitutes a blowie, they started telling blowjob stories.  One girl says "I'll only swallow if I love him... If he's just some random dude at the bar I'll let him come on my tits or something."

A few 'random dudes' at the bar heard this and started planning their evening.  More guys were getting riled up, but noone dared approach them... they didn't want the conversation to end.

And as the drinks kept flowing, their volume rose.

And their conversation somehow got clearer through the noise and bustle of the bar...

They talked about technique... tugging versus twisting, licking versus sucking...

More and more faces on the men had that 'awkward boner' look... slightly flushed, looking around to see if anyone is noticing, all while staying attentive to the conversation at hand...

"You know, one guy I was with liked to talk dirty.  He told me 'gargle my balls, baby' so I did.  I took one in my mouth and went 'HGLRGLWRRRRGL...'  His dick INSTANTLY deflated!"

One guy at the bar laughed, and tried to cover it up.  He almost fucked it up for all of us, as the girls still didn't realize we were listening to every word they were saying...

Once they were done with blowjob talk, they went into 'one-upsmanship' mode with sex stories.  Places they've been, sizes they've been with (which turned off a lot of guys, fearing they can't compete) and brag brag brag.

They both, at one point, agreed to the fact that "ass is the new pussy," as they both seemed to prefer it in the back door.

More guys with awkward boner faces.  Not even the bartender wanted to come from behind the bar to serve people drinks at their table...

The conversation finally ended with both girls leaving together.  No guy was brave enough to approach, so they left alone.

Two minutes of awkward silence later, the bar erupted into talk again.  This time, about those girls and their conversation.

I guess most of the men were waiting for the blood to flow back into their brains?

Or they don't like talking to other men when they're pitching a tent in their pants....

Either/or, it made for a fun night.  If only the 4H kids knew what their moms were really like, and if only the other parents knew as well.

As for the bar, we all knew.  And that's good enough for me.

11/14/12

Dregon, Will You Accept This Rose?

Businesses know that you have to get new foot traffic in your door to increase sales.  A larger customer base means larger revenue, so you as a business owner need to think of creative ways to get fresh faces into your store.

An Idaho florist has a great idea:  From time to time, they will do a "If your name is ______ come in and get a free rose."

Who doesn't like a free rose, right?  I would win one, take it home to my girlfriend, watch her melt, get sex that night, and have made a new friend with this florist.

But my name isn't Arcturis.

Or Dushon.

Or Dregon.


Yes, this florist is creative and using a great marketing tool, but they're also cheap bastards.  Instead of saying "If your name is Helen" they pick odd names.

...I wonder how many free roses they actually give away...

I, for one, won't shop there because of this trick.  That, and they're about twice as much as the online delivery services.  I'm all about supporting my local independents, but not if you're going to rape my wallet.

Sorry Aladdin's...  Xiyubl won't be stopping in for their free rose today.  Or tomorrow.

11/12/12

Veterans Day Confusion

November 11th is when the US celebrates Veteran's Day.  We honor those who served and remember those who have fallen...

...unless the holiday falls on a Sunday.  Then fuck that shit, we will celebrate on a Monday so we can get the day off...

Sadly in Idaho, this is how it happened this year.

Like most National holidays, people fly their flags on Veterans Day.  But on Sunday, the only person on my block flying his flag was my neighbor across the street.

He was out tending to his truck, so I walked over and asked him about it.  He said he's the only one on this block who doesn't use the "Lazy Patriot" service that goes around putting flags in your lawn for you, so you look like you care.  He has his own, and he posts his flag when he's supposed to.

He goes on to tell me that the Lazy Patriot service doesn't work on Sunday, which is why you don't see an ocean of flags in all the lawns.  "The only flags you'll see today will be from people who do it their damn selves..."

And sure enough, Monday morning the flags were out.  Now, when a National Holiday falls on a Sunday, the banks and other government agencies get Monday off.  I get that.  But does that mean we should all celebrate on a Monday instead?

The Lazy Patriot company thinks so, since he (like the rest of this town) refuses to work on a Sunday.

...they will put down flags for Columbus Day, which has nothing to do with the United States, yet they won't properly honor veterans if it's a Sunday??


If your holiday falls on a Sunday, Idaho will honor you later.  "Independence Day, Halloween, Veterans Day, fuck you.  We'll be at temple if you need us.  See you Monday."

11/11/12

Oh Carolina...

This season looked so promising...

This was my cover photo on Facebook:


After today's performance in Denver, it's now this:


Cam spent more time on his back than my college girlfriend, thanks to their porous O-line.  After sack number 164 I stopped counting, removed my jersey and changed the channel.

Back in the day, I was an LA Rams fan (born and raised).  They moved to St. Louis, so when the team left so did my love for them.  I followed my favorite player, Kevin Greene, to a new franchise team in North Carolina.  I became a Panthers fan, and have supported my team ever since.

Now, I'm not so sure.  They have made a lot of dumb mistakes over the last few years, and during Referee-gate, Panthers owner Jerry Richardson is one of the main reason we had replacement refs for so long.

After 16 years, I am considering a divorce.  I'm sorry Panthers, but this isn't working out anymore...

If I use my last philosophy and follow one of my favorite players, I should become a Bears fan so I can root for Julius Peppers again...


...decisions decisions...

11/10/12

Digest 911 - A Fire Extinguisher for Your Horse (and for you!)

It's vlogging time!

Yes folks, I'm doing a vlog on a product that needs to be talked about.  Since I have a wide audience and this is a regional product, you may be interested in learning about it:


As mentioned in the video, LMF Horse Feeds is a company that designs feed specific to forage in the Western US.  Digest 911 is a universal product, but because it is sold by a regional company it's a little hard to find in Canada or on the East coast.

If you are a horse owner and want an emergency colic fix, this product is for you.

If you're a pet owner wanting to keep your dog from getting sick when traveling or going to the dog park, this product is for you.

Lastly, if you're like me and are sick of Tums or Pepto and need something for your heartburn or upset stomach, this product is for you (and will last a LONG time...).  I keep a small amount of 911 in an empty pill bottle, so I always have an emergency stash in my travel bag.  If I get sick on the road or need to balance out before an important meeting, 911 does the trick.

11/7/12

There's Got To Be A Morning After

Whelp, four more years.

Whether you think that is good or bad, it is what it is.

But this is what happens when your party puts up a candidate with as much charisma as a can of tomato soup...  48% of the country voted for 'Anyone but Obama,' even if that meant a fuckmuppet like Mitt Romney.

I mean, come on.  Republicans, you can do better.

And in 2016, you need to do better.  NOT Jeb Bush, find another family tree to pick your fruit from.

Politics aside, I had a lot of fun looking at the idiots on Facebook and Twitter last night.

For example, a lot of my dumber conservative friends now want to move to Canada.

O, Canada, where you already have universal healthcare and marriage equality.  You're a right-winger's dream.

Oh wait...



I know a lot of smart conservatives.  I know a lot of smart liberals.  But there are too many idiots out there, giving their political parties a bad name.

Oh well, onward and upward.  Here's to the next four years, and to having two good candidates in 2016 (yeah right).