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12/10/11

Back In My Natural Element: Cali Trip Day 1

I'm currently on a 3 day vacation in California.

Originally the plan was a Fri/Sat/Sun trip to California to see my boys, but it never works as planned.  I'm still going to spend a decent amount of time with them, but I'm left with lots of downtime.

So I arrived in California around 1pm Friday, and deep into SoCal around 3.  What's a boy to do, with so much time on his hands?

How about as many un-Idaho things as possible?

I spent a little time at the beach, since Idaho doesn't have a beach yet has an assload of seagulls.

I drove around with the windows rolled down, enjoying the weather in the high 60's... (it's fucking 15 in Idaho...)

I turned my radio to an Old School Hip Hop station, since there is no rap or hip hop allowed on Idaho's airwaves... (for some reason...)

I also went to a REAL sex shop, since Idaho's stores are horrible.  Their selection is bare, and most are hidden in cabinets so (gasp) the CHILDREN can't see!!  I didn't come to buy, I just came to enjoy the smut.

Lastly, I met up with an old friend in Huntington Beach and hit up a gay bar.

Yes, there is the occasional gay bar in Idaho, but they can't hold a homo-erotic candle to the ones in Cali.

And just my luck, we were there on drag show night.

My friend helps coordinate the whole she-bang (collects the dolla dollas from the ground for the performers, sews costumes/wigs, etc) so I came to watch her do her thang, as well as try to catch up on old times when she had a moment to breathe.

Drinks flowed.  The acts were hilarious.   I mean, come on.  Drag Queen Big Bird?  Yeah, she was there.  Drunken whore-ish Christmas Carols?  In abundance.

Good times were had by all.

Unfortunately, I'm a bit out of practice.  Around 1am I called it quits and headed back to the hotel.  But not before the scantily-clad twink selling shots came up to me, flirted for a bit, and tried to get me to stick my hand down his boxer-briefs...

I think I broke his heart when I said:

"I'm sorry, but I have two things to confess:  I'm taken and am faithful... and it's to a woman."

Poor guy didn't know what hit him.  But it felt good, since I was seen as a hot piece of ass.

Saturday morning will be with my boys... if my Saturday evening is free, I may find some more un-Idaho things to do.  The Adult Expo is in LA this weekend, and a porn expo sounds fun...
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9 witty retorts:

not displayed said...

You poor love, I can't believe it is happening again like that last trip. Fingers crossed you will get more time with your kids.

Very envious of the drag show. It is top of my list of things to see before I turn 50.

Are you sure you didn't buy your lady a present in the adult shop?

Pickleope said...

Hopefully the baby mamma realizes how much of an effort you're making to spend time with your kids and comes around.
I'm very jealous of your trip regardless. Oh to have a Hamburger Habit, or be where Seasonal Affective Disorder doesn't exist, or be able to drink a beer outside in December.
And there's nothing like a trip to a drag show for a good time and to feel like an actual desirable object.

Lady Estrogen said...

Here's to hoping you get some good visiting with your boys! And the porn expo seems enticing too...

D4 said...

Dude. You got hit on by a dude. 90% of your Christmas is SET right there.

Vapid Vixen said...

And it's to a woman! I could almost hear his audible gasp in response to your declaration of faithfulness. Despite the shortened visit with the kids, it sounds like a pretty good trip.

Sharon Day said...

Go to Muscle Beach in Venice and really soak up the freaks. You can't get that kind of show in the great white north.

Q said...

Hopefully, you'll get to spend plenty of time with your boys.

It sounds like you had a blast for the first evening there. A Drag Queen Big Bird kind of writes its own story. I've never been to a gay bar. I've heard they have the best entertainment and music, but the bars here in Jackson are just a little suspect. Too many low-lifes, I guess.

Enjoy Cali!

G said...

Sounds like a great night I love drag acts they're always a great laugh...
Hope you get lots of time with your boys

Nuker Zero said...

Haha! That's awesome. Gotta say, the ego boost could be felt all the way here in Washington. Feeling for you. Btw, you post a TON. Wish i was more on top of comments :O And HI G :D

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