Men obsess about their penis. Is it big enough, thick enough, does it 'last' long enough... did she feel it? Was I good?
Oh, you're talking about your ex again? Uh huh, mmhm... that's nice... Was he bigger than me?
I'm of decent size (I'm leaving it at that, since I have some family that reads this blog) and I, like 99% of guys out there, wouldn't mind a little more.
This is why I was utterly dismayed when I read an article about men having shorter penii (penises?) after getting prostate surgery.
I love the way the article starts: 'You're alive. Let's start there...' but most men would read the headline and shout 'GET TO THE SHRINKAGE!'
The article goes on to talk about the after-effects of prostate surgery. Some men lose a quarter-inch in length, some up to an inch and a half.
...do that math in your head, dudes. I'll wait...
That's quite a bit to lose, isn't it?
I'm still in my lower 30's, but I'm already thinking about prostate health. I don't want cancer of ANY form, but wang-shrinking cancer adds a bit to the scary-ness of the big C.
Some doctors even recommend starting around 40. It's virtually unheard-of before 35 and rare before 50, but better safe than sorry, right?
Men under 50, you don't need to be prodded just yet, but do a little research on preventative measures. Men's Fitness has a great article about some easy steps to take in order to keep your prostate healthy. Supplements, lifestyle changes (stop smoking), etc can go a LONG way.
Hell, some people even mention the benefits of 'milking' your prostate from time to time, to keep it lean and mean...
...that's at your own discretion, by the way. Keep it to yourself bucko...
No matter how you do it, do it. You don't want cancer. I don't want cancer. But this type of cancer has other effects as well... I love my little guy... all of him, and don't want to lose any bit of him.
Because size matters. To us. We're fail little creatures, us men... Our penis is our confidence, our manhood, our ego. Primitive yes, but important nonetheless.
A finger in the ass saved my father's life. He did have prostate cancer and while he was determined to kick it's ass (and did) the fear of losing some of his buddy OR the risk of losing his buddies ability to stand tall factored in largely to him. I understood the fear but it was nothing in comparison to losing my father.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, what's a finger in the ass now and again...you already turn and cough and all that shit, right? Drop the underwear and nut up, men...it could save your life.
Brandon-great post.
Totally agree. There's losers with both extremes. Coasting down the middle is quite nice . . . just don't lose any more! Ahem.
ReplyDeleteSize does matter. Too big is almost as bad as too small though. Betcha don't hear that too much. However anywhere in between it really doesn't matter. Size doesn't do much if you don't know how to do anything else.
ReplyDeleteSo maybe this is a good thing, for those in the 'too big' category? Dudes, if you need to trim it down a bit, just get prostate cancer...
ReplyDeleteThanks for making my penis disappear like the head of a frightened turtle. Actually I've had prostate exams and colonoscopies and they really aren't all that bad. You;re providing good advice to guys, and in a way sure to catch their attention.
ReplyDeleteOMG Stick in my ass please because I CANNOT afford to lose a quarter inch at this point. Fuck!
ReplyDeleteStick "it" in my ass, is what I meant to say... Jesus, that sounds weird. I should just stop.
ReplyDeleteJust a couple more years before my ass gets violated. I'm so not looking forward to it....but if it will save my manhood...
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