My Shitty Week in Salt Lake City

Don't get me wrong, I had fun this week in SLC.  The title of this post is to be taken literally.

It's about poop.

not completely related, but funny

While doing my exciting "Feed Me, Twitter" project, I ate a lot of exciting and rich foods.  Overall the experiment was a huge success, except for one large problem.

I was blocked up pretty bad.  To the point where I was in a little pain.

I had never been in a position to have to buy a laxative before, so this is new territory for me.  Luckily I'm near a Target, so I run over to get something to help.

Soooooo many choices...

I decide on an ex-lax product that has chocolate instead of pills or liquid.  I think "eating chocolate can't be too bad" so I buy the box and head back to my car.

I still haven't picked up dinner, so I'm reading the instructions at a red light.

"Take 1-2 pieces as needed, or daily for regular use."

I open the box.

It only has two bars in it.

What kind of a laxative box only comes with two pieces in it?  (look at the picture.  See '24?'  I didn't...)

So I unwrap a bar, shove it in my mouth, and chew on the nastiest piece of chocolate I've ever had.  "Wow, that's a lot of chocolate for just one dose" I think as I swallow...

After I park, I think about it some more.  I look at the front of the box, and see '24.'  I take out the other bar, and notice it has 12 little grooved pieces you're supposed to break apart.

I just had 12... and you're only supposed to have 1-2 at a time...

Oh crap.  Literally.

I pick up dinner, sweating a little.  This is going to be a bad night.  Worried, I go back to the hotel, eat dinner, and wait.

...nothing.

Watch some TV, nothing.

Get tired, and go to bed... nothing...

Maybe it was a false alarm?  Maybe I'll be ok?

And I was.

....until about 2am...