My girlfriend and I were wandering around Target on a Sunday afternoon, killing time and looking for inspiration.
She found her inspiration in a few notebooks on clearance for $1, that she can 'craft up' and resell for $10 each. I found mine in the gift wrap section:
Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a tube of gift wrap. It was a Paul Frank design, with his famous monkeys. As I rotated the tube, I spotted this:
The giftwrap roll cut off the faces perfectly, making a row of vaginas.
Yes, you too can own a tube of vaginas.
What worried me most were the braces. The 'brace face' monkey looked like a scary hymen. If I were in the bedroom or the back seat of a car, and saw THAT, I would be a little intimidated...
It also reminded me of the movie "Teeth" where a woman's nether regions have fangs, and she goes on a sexual adventure, dismembering members left and right.
Yes, I went there.
Have you ever spotted some odd odd things while shopping? If it tops a tube of monkey vaginas, please share below.
That one has Vaginas Dentata! Run! Paul Frank knew what he was doing.
ReplyDeleteLol this post cracked me up... I'm going to think about odd things I've seen while shopping - and if I come up with anything better than a tube of vaginas I'll be back to let you know.
ReplyDeleteBut the question is - did you buy it?
Ok, I've got it! Shopping in India and came across a row of baby dolls - or maybe I should say little boy dolls. They had perfectly detailed and very explicitly designed male genitalia.
ReplyDeleteYes, that's Vagina dentata at its very best. Well done :)
ReplyDeleteVagina's with teeth?
ReplyDeleteNooooooo thank you.
I don't know that I have ever stumbled upon a roll of monkey vagina wrapping paper. You can bet your sweet ass I'll be on the look out for it now though~
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure which is worse, vagina dentata, or that they need corrective braces. I mean, if you're gonna have teeth down there, they might as well be straight, right?
ReplyDeleteI was at Target in the checkout line. On top of the soda case was a toy goat. Next to it? A box of KY. I'm sure someone put them there on purpose but it was funny nonetheless.
ReplyDeletelol creepy...
ReplyDeleteI love the braces- the new monkey vagina chastity belt. A sure fire way to keep those horny male monkeys away!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI never wanted to see that movie "Teeth." There is absolutely no way I could have sat through that movie. And who even thought of that? Why would someone say, "Hmmmm, what if a vagina had teeth?"
ReplyDeleteAnd what would make a producer think about it and say, "that's a great idea for a movie!"
A tube of vaginas? Well that's my friday night sorted.
ReplyDeletethat's not a vagina... it's my sister...
ReplyDeleteBut, I thought a tube of vagina was a fleshlight.
ReplyDeleteIt's all monkey business anyway.
I wonder how many people end up with paper cuts trying to have at it with a tube of vaginas?
ReplyDeleteAww, you got my hopes up for nothing.
ReplyDeleteYou know I don't even have a penis, but looking at that "vagina" with teeth and braces made my penis hurt! HaHa
ReplyDeleteYou're supposed to smoke AFTER you get home from Target, not before...
ReplyDeleteSir, your monkey looks like a vagina...
Where did all these monkey vaginas come from? It's a tube of monkey vaginas with braces on.
Don't say that out loud too much.
Is it weird that when I clicked on your link, I had a notepad in hand to jot down the details of where I could purchase a tube of vaginas?
ReplyDeleteOh Brandon...BLASPHEMY!
ReplyDeleteIf you knew me IRL, you would know how much of a Paul Frank crack head I am. I am currently wearing monkey vagina slippers and a monkey vagina nightshirt.
BLASPHEMY I SAY!!!
Hed
bwhahahhahahah thats awesome, the braces remind me of a zipper, that would be awesome if ya ask me! :)
ReplyDeleteWhy is it that more people don't see the Paul Frank monkey face as an obvious "sideways vagina"? Couple that with the fact that "monkey" has become euphemistic for "vagina" and I'd say it's pretty obvious what Frank's logo is all about. Some might say subliminal, I say sublime! ;)
ReplyDelete