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12/26/11

How the Kitten Tried to Steal Christmas

My new(ish) kitten tried to play the role of the Grinch this Christmas.

She made it a point to try and shred every roll of giftwrap we had in the house.  Bows were targets, needing to be destroyed.  Boxes?  Chewed on in odd places.

All because she knew we had some kitty toys for her, and she couldn't get them early.

We managed to hide the gifts, and wrap in hidden places.  We never decorated the tree, because we knew all ornaments would be taken down and possibly destroyed.  In other words, we revolved our Christmas preparations around this little bitch of a kitten.

She did everything in her power to stop this Christmas from coming.

Days passed, the kitten was decent, so we forgot about all of her shenanigans.  It was time to bake cookies, and bake we did.  Sugar cookies, gingerbread cookies, snickerdoodles, and scores of other varieties.  Frosting was slapped on, gumdrop and cinnamon decorations adorned the treats, and we started to pack and giftwrap boxes for neighbors and family.

When I spotted this:


I started to inspect some of the cookies a little closer, and she had trampled at least a dozen cookies on the kitchen table.  Her destructive nature was just taking a quick vacation, but was back in full force.

I should have just given her a lump of coal for Christmas.  Or a concussion.  But she still made out like a fucking bandit....

10 comments:

  1. Lady Estrogen12/26/11, 10:03 AM

    I keep saying that cats are good for one thing...

    Anyhow, seasons greetings and all that! x

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown12/26/11, 10:07 AM

    After the last few incidents, I'm starting to believe you...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Bart12/26/11, 10:17 AM

    hahaha pwnd

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mooner's Full Of Holiday Spirits12/26/11, 11:52 AM

    Brandini. That, dear friend, is why they're called fucking cats.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Q12/26/11, 12:52 PM

    Cats are evil. I will go to my grave believing it. The Mrs. wants one, but I'm terrified that it will jump up and pull my flat screen off of the entertainment center. I need a pet that stays on the ground and doesn't want to play with anything. I need a fish or a turtle.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous12/26/11, 1:31 PM

    Ha! I laughed so hard, I snorted a little! (Good work detective! I think you found the culprit!)

    ReplyDelete
  7. D412/26/11, 8:52 PM

    I'm sorry. Cat's way too cute, I can't. Adorable.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Jessica ( frellathon )12/27/11, 1:23 AM

    She sounds like my cat. Damn fur ball.

    ReplyDelete
  9. not displayed12/27/11, 2:40 AM

    keep feeding her. She will get fat and lazy and your Christmas tree will no longer be attractive. I know this, it works

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous12/28/11, 10:16 AM

    That's adorable! It was her way of helping decorate!

    ReplyDelete

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